字神帝國英語天地

24 Signs You're An Old Person Disguised In A 20-Something Body
　　
►For years you've wondered why you could never fully relate to other people your age.
這麼多年來，你可能一直在想，為什麼你與同齡人總是有點格格不入。
What about hookup culture is appealing? Why are girls showing their midriff in the winter? How are the horrendous things they play on the radio considered “good” music?
比如，你不明白為什麼約炮文化如此盛行？為什麼女孩兒冬天還要穿露臍裝？電臺裡那麼難聽的東西怎麼能稱之為“好”音樂？
►At times, you probably even refer to Millennials as if you're not a part of the demographic yourself. The reason? You're an old soul stuck in a twenty-something year-old's body.
有時你可能會把他們稱為“千禧一代”——說的好像你自己不是其中一員似的。為什麼會出現這種情況？因為你20幾歲的身體內，住著一個成熟的靈魂。
　　
►Here are some signs:
跡象如下：
1◉ You'd rather spend the night in your bed then out with your friends.
你寧願整晚窩在床上，也不願跟朋友們出去嗨。
2◉ You're annoyed by all of the annoying teenagers who play their music way too loud.
年輕人大聲放著惱人的音樂，會讓你煩的不得了。
What's the point in even wearing headphones?
他們竟然還戴著耳機聽，跟外放又有什麼兩樣呢？
3◉ Baking brings you great joy.
你愛上了烘焙。
4◉ You've secretly always wanted to join a knitting class.
你心裡一直偷偷想要加入一個編織培訓班。
5◉ Young & The Restless is your shit.
《不安分的青春》這類劇不是你的菜。
6◉ You enjoy walking for leisure.
你喜歡散步休閒。
7◉ You complete newspaper crossword puzzles everyday on your morning commute.
在每天早晨的通勤路上，你會做完報紙的填字遊戲。
8◉ You despise the radio and listen to the oldies instead.
你看不上電臺音樂，而是找已經不再流行的音樂來聽。
Louis Armstrong, Frank Sinatra, the Beatles…the list is far and great.
路易士·阿姆斯壯、弗蘭克·辛納屈、披頭士樂隊……這種好聽的音樂簡直太多了。
9◉ You refuse to text in acronyms.
你發短信時不用略縮語。
10◉ You're always in some sort of pain for no apparent reason.
身體某些部位經常會莫名其妙的出現疼痛。
Your lower back, shoulders, baby toes, ankles, BASICALLY EVERYTHING.
你的後腰、肩膀、小腳趾、腳踝，基本上全身都疼。
11◉ Your knees crack when sitting down, standing up, walking up the stairs, walking down the stairs…
當你坐下、站起、上樓、下樓的時候，你會聽到膝蓋發出哢擦的聲音。
12◉ There's nothing more that you love than covering up.
你不愛露肉。
13◉ You frequently mishear the things that people say.
你經常把別人說的話聽錯。
14◉ You still hand-write your lecture notes.
你仍然手寫課堂筆記。
15◉ House slippers, fuzzy socks, and snuggies make you smile.
家裡的拖鞋、毛絨襪子、保暖內衣，你喜歡的不得了。
16◉ Your signature dance move is the Chicken Dance, The Lightbulb, or the YMCA.
你標誌性的舞步是小雞舞、燈泡舞或YMCA舞。
17◉ You think housework is therapeutic.
家務能讓你放鬆身心。
18◉ If you do go out, 12AM is your designated “time to call an Uber home” time.
如果你外出，半夜12點是你指定“該打輛優步回家了”的時刻。
19◉ You have a serious passion for wine tasting.
你對品紅酒這事兒挺認真、有熱情的。
20◉ You take pride in your ever-growing book collection.
你為自己不斷增長的藏書而驕傲。
21◉ You aren't on social media.
你不玩社交媒體。
…partially because you're technologically challenged.
……一部分原因是因為你對科技之類的東西不太擅長。
22◉ You need naps to function correctly.
你需要靠午睡來恢復身體機能。
23◉ You ask for practical gifts on Christmas.
耶誕節你偏愛實用的禮物。
Candles and knee-high socks excite you.
蠟燭和齊膝長襪都好極啦。
24◉ People your actual age exhaust you.
同齡人好像都比你更有體力。
　　
【Vocabulary】
⋆midriff：上腹部; 胸與腰之間的部分
⋆horrendous：可怕的；驚人的
⋆snuggies：女式保暖長內衣

文章來源：24條都中？說明你20歲的身體裡住了個老靈魂！