字神帝國英語天地

雅思寫作拿高分不易，因為用文字清晰完整地討論一個問題本來就不易，更不用提要用英語來書寫。很多考生被灌輸了高難詞彙句型再套點模板的一整套捷徑寫作思路。所以，背了若干高難度的詞彙和長難句，一到考試就忍不住要塞進去。結果讓文章的可讀性和基本的表達準確性很低。

下面就來看一些例子，體會一些寫得併不成功的長句和如何修改的建議：

雅思寫作精簡建議一：避免空洞的單詞和詞組

1.一些空洞的單詞或詞組根本不能為句子帶來任何相關或重要的信息，完全可以刪掉。

比如：When all things are considered, young adults of today live more satisfying lives than those of their parents, in my opinion.

這句話當中的“when all things are considered”和“in my opinion“都顯得多餘。完全可以去掉。改為：

Young adults of today live more satisfying lives than their parents.

2.有些空洞和繁瑣的表達方式可以進行替換。

例如：Due to the fact that our grandparents were under an obligation to help their parents, they did not have the options that young people have at this point in time.

“due to the fact that”就是一個很典型的繁瑣的表達方式的例子，可以替換，簡化為下面的表達方式：

Because our grandparents were obligated to help their parents, they did not have the options that young people have now.

雅思寫作精簡建議二：避免重複

1.盡量避免重複使用同樣的詞彙。或者有的時候雖然詞彙沒有重複，但意思卻有重複。這時候可以做一些簡化的工作。

例如下面這個例子：The farm my grandfather grew up on was large in size.

large對一個farm來說就是size方面的large，所以in size可以去掉，改為：

The farm my grandfather grew up on was large.

更簡潔的表達方式為：

My grandfather grew up on a large farm.

2.有時一個詞組可以用一個更簡單的單詞來替換。

例如：My grandfather has said over and over again that he had to work on his parents' farm.

這裡的over and over again就可以改為repeatedly，顯得更為簡潔：

My grandfather has said repeatedly that he had to work on his parents' farm.

雅思寫作精簡建議三：選擇最恰當的語法結構

選擇合適的語法結構可以使句子意思的表達更為精確和簡練。雖然語法的多樣性也很重要，但選擇最恰當的語法結構仍然是更為重要的考慮因素。以下原則是在考慮選擇何種語法結構時可以參考的原則：

1.一個句子的主語和謂語動詞應該能夠反映句子中最重要的意思。

例如：The situation that resulted in my grandfather's not being able to study engineering was that his father needed help on the farm.

從意思上來分析，上面這句話需要表達的重要的概念是“grandfather's not being able to study”，而在表達這個概念時，原句用的主語是situation，謂語動詞是was，不能強調需要表達的重點概念，可以改為下面這句話：

My grandfather couldn't study engineering because his father needed help on the farm.

2.避免頻繁使用“there be”結構。

例如下面的句子：There were 25 cows on the farm that my grandfather had to milk every day. It was hard work for my grandfather.

可以改為：

My grandfather worked hard. He had to milk 25 cows on the farm every day.

更簡潔的句式為：

My grandfather worked hard milking 25 cows daily.

3.把從句改為短語或單詞。

例如：Dairy cows were raised on the farm,which was located100 kilometers from the nearest university and was in an areathat was remote.

簡介的表達方式為：

The dairy farm was located in a remotearea, 100 kilometers to the nearest university.

4.僅在需要強調賓語而不是主語的時候，才使用被動語態。

例如：In the fall, not only did the cows haveto be milked, but also the hay was mowed and stacked by my grandfather'sfamily.

本句不夠簡潔的原因是本句的重心應該是“忙碌的家庭-mygrandfather's family”，而使用了被動語態後，彷彿重心變成了cows和hay。下面的表達方式是主動語態，相對來說更簡潔一些：

In the fall, my grandfather's family notonly milked the cow but also mowed and stacked the hay.

5.用更為精確的一個動詞來代替動詞短語。

例如：My grandfather didn't have time tostand around doing nothing with his school friends.

Stand around doing nothing其實可以用一個動詞來表達，即loiter：

My grandfather didn't have time toloiter with his school friends.

6.有時兩句話的信息經過組合完全可以用一句話來簡練地表達。

例如：Profits from the farm were not large.Sometimes they were too small to meet the expenses of running a farm. They werenot sufficient to pay for a university degree.

兩句話的信息可以合併為下面這句更為簡潔的句子：

Profits from the farm were sometimes toosmall to meet operational expenses, let alone pay for a university degree.